Jana's Corner

Get Rid of the Buts and Butts in Your Life

I have decided that butts, or negative people, do not belong in my life. I don't want them. I don't need them. I refuse to let negative people in, or influence me. At times this is not a easy task. And sometimes, unfortunately, I am the butt.

This new found knowledge of my disliking butts, got me thinking about the other but. You know this one. This is the one we use in our language and in our writing. "She is a wonderful person, but...." "You did a great job, but..... " "I am so proud of you, but..." "I love you, but..."

This last example is the one that hurts the most, and unfortunately, I have heard it a few times. Anytime I hear a but, I know that everything the person said, or wrote , before the but, is nil and void.

The great replacement for but is and. "She is a wonderful person, and...." "You did a great job, and...." " I am so proud of you, and..." "I love you, and..." This and replacement comes from the world of Improvisational Theater where you are taught to add to whatever idea, your improvisational partner gives you. You are taught to contribute positively with an and instead of responding with a negative but.

Think about how much better our world would be if we all used and instead of but? Think about how much better the workplace would be if we all contributed to each others ideas, instead of saying "Tom, great idea, but let me tell you all the reasons why it won't work." Tom, after hearing this is not likely to contribute again. What if Tom heard, "Tom, great idea, and to add to that, what if we do this?"

I think that if we outlawed all the buts and butts from her homes, schools, and workplaces, we would all communicate more, and be much more productive. Let's add to each other lives, and quit being so negative. And what do you think?

Jana Ruth
Author of Laugh and Live Happier: P.L.A.Y.S. for Life
www.janaruth.biz
www.laughandlivehappier.com
www.laughingworld.blogspot.com